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Travelling in England an American lady got into a compartment of a smoking carriage-where an Englishman was smoking a pipe. For a short time she was sitting quietly, expecting that the Englishman would stop smoking.
In half an hour she began to cough and sneeze, trying to show that she objected to the smoke. At last, seeing that all her efforts to attract his attention failed, she addressed him impatiently:
“If you were a gentleman, you would stop smoking when a lady got into the carriage.” “If you were a lady”, answered the Englishman, “you would not get into a smoking carriage”.
“If you were my husband,” said the American lady angrily “I should give you poison”. The Englishman looked at her for a moment or two. “Well,” he said at last, “if I were your husband, I would take it”.